The Waiting Room

The drywall is up, new shut-off valves, wiring for the lights and GFCIs were installed. Paint prep and painting will start today. But, there is just one thing.

I WANT MY HOUSE BACK!!!!!

No matter how much one tries to clean up, there is a lot of dust associated with this project. Dust is everywhere! Also, since the half bath is off the kitchen, my kitchen is ground zero for some of the equipment during the day. Bottom line, my house is a mess.

The Boy returned to daycare today. I just think it's the best thing for him. Plus, I think one of the guys is afraid of dogs. As for me, I am going for a pedi later this morning and then lunch with Husband. Hopefully, this afternoon will be a little better on the construction site.

All the other heathens are doing it!

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Well, the bathroom is gutted and they are putting up the drywall today. If you are wondering why it took so long to gut the bath room, you have to get a metal image of what had to be demolished. Plastic tile on the walls with about an inch of glue to hold 'em! Just sad! What in the hell were people thinking back then?

I have a toilet sitting on my patio. Too funny! I should post a picture!

The Boy got a report card from daycare. He received five paws out of five! (Although, I would like to know where a dog gets an extra paw!) He had a total blast. When he came home, he ate his dinner and crashed in his bed for the rest of the night! Cost for eight hours of doggie daycare...$20. Cost for one tired but happy pooch...priceless.

Today, the Boy is staying with me in the office while the crew works. I don't think he likes it very much. Every time I move, he gets up and wants to go with me. I am going to take him for a walk before it gets too hot. It is supposed to get up to 85 degrees today. I think I might send him back to daycare tomorrow.

The bathroom remodeling project begins today. Today is demolition day. The crew will gut the old bathroom. That means taking everything out, walls, fixtures, etc. I don't think the demolition will take too long, since it is only a half bath. Don't worry, I took a "before" photo!!!!

In order to avoid the noise, Husband took the Boy to daycare. I am going shopping this morning and then to the hair salon this afternoon. I need some new books to read. I just finished Eat, Pray, Love. There is a new James Patterson book from the Women's Murder Club series that is out now. As far as the hair goes, I am having my color done and a trim. At some point, I should have the straightening process again.

I spent part of yesterday updating my Internet service. Big, evil cable company bought my bankrupt cable company last year. Now, all of the email address and other services are changing to the new provider. Let me just say that big, evil provider is truly evil. They actually have their own "blue screen of death". After installing all the new software, I would get the BSD every time I would try to log in to big, evil cable company's homepage. The BSD wants you to change your security settings to fit their service. Well, I did that, step by step, and still got the BSD! Since my home email works fine with Outlook, big, evil cable company can choke on thier BSD!

I have a new email address for those of you who wish to contact me.

SeekingSolaceBlog@gmail.com

Mandy, the dog on the left, is the Boy's new girlfriend at playgroup. She is a German Shepard Dog. The Boy spent most of the evening pursuing her, much to the dismay of Gretta, the Weimaraner, the Boy's other girlfriend!

All the cool music folk are doing this one!

What's your earliest music memory?
Hearing my father sing old Motown songs or classic R&B Soul. He had an incredible voice.

What's the first pop song you remember hearing ?
Pretty much anything that one would have heard on AM radio like Bread, Seals and Crofts, America.

What's the first rock song you remember hearing?
I am not sure. I think it was either something by Styx or the Kinks.

What's the first classical music piece you remember hearing?
A Fifth of Beethoven. I heard it after realizing that Beethoven wrote it before Walter Murphy sampled it for Saturday Night Fever. (Hey, I was just a kid!)

What's the first piece/song you remember that doesn't fit into those genres?
The Message by Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five and Rapper's Delight by the Sugar Hill Gang. The pioneers of rap and hip-hop!

What's the first album/cd you bought for yourself/you asked your parents to buy for you?
"On the Radio" by Donna Summer. I loved that album. (Yes, we bought albums and 45's back in the day!)

What's a favorite song from grade school?
I remember in the sixth grade, you were not considered cool unless you had one of the following: "Off the Wall" by Michael Jackson, "On the Radio" by Donna Summer or "Saturday Night Fever"

I am also convinced that everyone who came of age in the 80"s was issued a copy of "Synchronicity" by the Police.

By the time junior high and high school rolled around, it was all about Duran Duran, U2 and the Thompson Twins. I was a total new waver, alternative chick!

A song that reminds you of school dances?
In junior high, people would go crazy when "Whip It" by Devo was played. Power ballads a la Journey and REO Speedwagon were a big deal in high school!

Which genre do you listen to most now?

Classic rock, thanks to Husband. I am huge fan of the Who, Zep, Clapton, the Stones, Floyd, etc. I also love singer-songwriters, both 70's and current. I love alternative like REM, DMB and Sarah McLachlan, although I think they call Adult Alternative now. I also like some country. There are some good artists out there that have a rock base to them.

I am not a huge fan of today's music scene mostly because it's just someone stealing another artist's hook and adding crappy lyrics to it. The is no musicianship anymore. At least the hair bands of the 80's played instruments...maybe not well, but they tried!

Which favorite song/album/piece from your musical history are your readers least likely to know?

I have a pretty eclectic music library. There's rock, alternative, country, blues, R&B, rap...so much to choose from! Now, I am listening to more stuff that I grew up on like 70's rock and R&B.

I did go through this huge Mariah Carey phase in the early 90's. Must be a mixed girl thing!

My neighbor is working in his front yard. He is in his 60's and is not in very good physical shape. HE IS WEARING A PURPLE SPEEDO!!!!!!

Now I know how Tommy felt, except I can still hear and speak!!!!

I have a blister on each foot!!! OUCH!!!!!!!!

Yes, they both broke and they hurt like HELL!!!!

My feet are not happy!!!!

Chaser posted the Fat Rant on her blog recently. It made me think of the TLC song "Unpretty".

I wish could tie you up in my shoes
Make you feel unpretty too
I was told I was beautiful
But what does that mean to you
Look into the mirror who's inside there
The one with the long hair
Same old me again today (yeah)

My outsides look cool
My insides are blue
Every time I think I'm through
It's because of you
I've tried different ways
But it's all the same
At the end of the day
I have myself to blame
I'm just trippin'

Chorus:
You can buy your hair if it won't grow
You can fix your nose if he says so
You can buy all the make up
That man can make
But if you can't look inside you
Find out who am I too
Be in the position to make me feel
So damn unpretty
I'll make you feel unpretty too

Never insecure until I met you
Now I'm be-in' stupid
I used to be so cute to me
Just a little bit skinny
Why do I look to all these things
To keep you happy
Maybe get rid of you
And then I'll get back to me (hey)

My outsides look cool
My insides are blue
Every time I think I'm through
It's because of you
I've tried different ways
But it's all the same
At the end of the day
I have myself to blame
I'm just trippin'

Chorus:
You can buy your hair if it won't grow
You can fix your nose if he says so
You can buy all the make up
That man can make
But if you can't look inside you
Find out who am I too
Be in the position to make me feel
So damn unpretty
I'll make you feel unpretty too

I never realized how technical shopping for a toilet can be! Husband and I went shopping yesterday at a popular home improvement store. There had to be about 20 different toilets on display. All different specs, colors and styles.

Of course, you have to consider water pressure to ensure that you are not wasting water. But geez, there is so much more. There is the two piece vs. one piece design. There is the high back or the low back. There is the regular or elongated bowl. Do you want the flusher on the side or the top? What color?

It's just a freakin' toilet. Shit!

Dreams of hoisting Lord Stanley's Cup have evaded Lake Effect Snow Central once again. Hockey season is now over.

Sigh...

Seen at Lina's

Your Power Bird is an Owl

You are beyond wise. You are so smart, you're almost prophetic. Your inner voice always speaks the truth, and you take the time to listen to it. You are good at seeing who people are... including the darkness of others. As a result, you tend to have a rather dark - yet realistic - outlook on life.

It took some time to get Husband out the door and on his way to his camping-fishing trip. It's amazing how much stuff one needs to take with them. Also, Husband has to conduct his "neurosis check", despite the fact that I am in the house. He checks everything...stove, back door, hot water tank...everything. Finally, he was ready to leave...

Me: Have a great time and I love you.
Him: Love you too. Don't forget to lock the doors. And if you go out with GML, make sure you buckle up.

What? No have a great time? Remember to buckle my seat belt? Like I go around not wearing my seat belt? Like GML is such a bad driver that I should worry about my safety? (BTW, she is a very safe driver). Yes, I would have left the doors wide open had he not reminded me.

I immediately busted him for the comment. Of course, I know Husband wants me to have a good time. I know that he knows that I don't do anything as stupid as to not wear my seat belt. I also know that he knows that there is nothing wrong with GML"s driving skill or that of any of my other friends. I know that he knows that I make sure that the doors are locked before going to bed.

But sometimes it just irritates the hell out of me. I know it's the OCD that has been passed down to him from his father. And, I know that he does it because he loves me so much. And it could be worse. He could be one of those guys who couldn't care less about my well-being. I know all of this.

I did not go out with GML last night because she was not feeling well. But, I did check the doors three times last night before going to bed.

• Melinda was "Daughtry-ied" on AI last night. Boy, you didn't see that one coming! I wonder if statistically it worked out because there were two girls or if the show is truly rigged and they wanted Blake and Jordan so that there would be a competition. On the plus side, Melinda will no doubt get a record contract.
• I am still rooting for Jordan.
• Favorite Hockey Team pull one out last night. Unbelievable.
• Speaking of hockey, GML's husband is a die hard hockey fan. It's so bad that she is stuck going to two get-togethers alone this weekend because hubby is glued to the TV!
• I have the contractor who remodeled my kitchen two years ago stopping by today. It's time to complete the half bath. Also, I have to replace the door that leads to my patio. The problem is that the door measures 24 inches. No one makes that size anymore, so I will have to move a wall to accommodate a 32 inch door. I am excited that I will finally be rid of the puke yellow plastic wall tile and linoleum!
• I also have a fence contractor stopping by to give an estimate for replacing the backyard fence.
• It is freakin' cold here.
• Husband is going running with his buddy tonight, which means that the Boy has a play-date with his buddy, Sage.
• Speaking of Husband, he is leaving Friday for a camping and fishing trip with his brothers and buddies. So, it's just me and the Boy for the weekend. I'm thinking Mexican food, movie and hockey! I ordered "Dreamgirls" from Netflix yesterday.
• GML and I were talking about having a girl's night tomorrow since, her hubby can doggie sit!
• Cold symptoms mostly gone. I would like to thank the makers of Tylenol and CVS "Tussin" for their continued assistance!

I am sick. How is that possible, seeing as I am home with the Boy most of the day?

Possible theories...

• All the nasty people at the casino spewed their germs on me.
• The Boy brought them in the house after rolling in the grass in the backyard.
• The absolutely horrendous performance of Favorite Hockey Team last night and for the entire series has just worn me out.
• Husband is a carrier for a the people he works with who insist on coming to work sick.

Any other theories out there? Cough, cough...

As I mentioned in the post below, Husband and I saw B.B. King on Saturday night. Here's a list of our faves.

• The Thrill is Gone (My personal favorite. It reminds me of my great uncle who taught me about B.B. and the Blues)
• Everyday I Have the Blues
• Just Like a Woman
• Paying the Cost to be the Boss
• How Blue Can You Get?
• When Love Comes to Town
• Nobody Loves Me But My Mother
• Rock Me Baby
• Let the Good Times Roll
• To Know You is to Love You.

Play on, Blues Boy!

What a weekend. I am still tired.

Saturday morning, Husband, the Boy and I met up with GML, her husband, Eli Blue and Frankie for a dog walk to raise money for a local no kill animal shelter. The Boy and Eli are old buddies, but this was the Boy's introduction to Frankie. The pups got along very well.

When we participated in this even last year, Husband and I were running late because we were unfamiliar with the area. Eli did not take kindly to our late arrival and began stomping his paws and began huffing and barking at the Boy. This year, GML and her hubby were late, so the Boy began to bark up a storm when he saw his buddy!

The walk was a lot of fun. We must have walked at least 3 miles, taking water breaks for the pooches. Frankie is still learning how to walk on his leash, so he tugs pretty hard. He wanted to keep up with the big dogs!

There was a minister who gave a blessing to the dogs before the walk began. That was really nice. But after the blessing, the minister set up a booth to give "Psychic Paw Readings". Weird. I could just hear what she would say to the Boy "You will sniff another dog's butt!"

After the dog walk and a light snack, we headed home. Husband and I wanted to talk a nap because we had tickets to see B.B King at one of the casinos in the area. We had not been to the new casino, so we thought it would be fun to make a night of it. We gathered all the spare nickels and quarters for the slot machines.

First, let me say that if you get a chance to see B.B. King, DO IT! The man is 81 years old and is still going strong, despite having to sit during the show. His stories are wonderfully funny. And the dude can play like no-body's business! At one point during the show, he dedicated a song to all the parents, grandparents and others that taught you about him. That made me smile because everything I know about the Blues and B.B. King I learned from my great uncle who died in March. Ironically, the seat next to me was empty. I have a feeling my uncle was sitting next to me!

OK, now to bitch about the casino. Now, I am not a casino virgin. I have been to many a casino in my lifetime. But this was one of the worst experiences I have ever had. Like I mentioned, we gathered all our spare change to play the slots. Well, for some reason, this casino does not take coins. You have to insert bills! When we asked one of the casino attendants if there were any slots that took coins, she coldly responded " You can't use coins here. It's bills or nothing. Take those back to your car right now." Um, since when can't you use coins in a slot machine?

So, we took our coins back to our car and decided to go get something to eat. We thought we would try the buffet restaurant. On the casino's website, it was the only restaurant that did not require a reservation. So, we walked into the buffet and was told that we had to get a reservation. Excuse me? So, we went to the reservation desk where we were told that a reservation was needed, but nothing would be available until 8 PM. Well, that was not going to work because our show started at 8 PM. I mentioned to the hostess that the website said nothing about a reservation. She rudely point to the sign and said "Well, read the sign!" I politely mention that someone should inform thier webmaster because there is some misinformation on the website and it would be a shame if someone else made the same mistake. She looked at me and growled "My manager is over there, go tell him."

Excuse me????

So, we ended up at another restaurant in the casino which stated that you needed reservations, but for some reason, we were able to get a table. The food was OK, but not worth $60.00.

Pretty much the entire night, anyone we would encounter was rude. Plus, no one, not even the people visiting the casino, appeared happy. There was a woman sitting next to Husband during the show who just sat there with her arms folded and this evil scowl on her face. She did not clap. She did not sing along. She just sat there like she was doing B.B. King a favor.

To add insult to injury, we made it home in time to watch Favorite Hockey Team lose in double overtime. D"OH!!!!!!

Yesterday, we just hang out at home. We did not get up until 11 AM. Well, I was up at 8 AM to let the Boy out and give him his breakfast, but I went right back to sleep. We were just so exhausted! I wrote an email to the casino yesterday to complain about the experience. I doubt I will get a response. I don't think we will be going back there.

On the plus side, I got big sloppy kisses from the Boy for Mother's Day!

The Boy has a very busy social calendar.

Monday was playgroup. This is what happens about 10 minutes before playgroup ends.

Last night, he met his friend, Sage, for a dog walk. Sage's Dad and Husband did thier running workout while Sage's mom and I took the boys for a walk around the park. They couldn't wait to relax in the grass.

Home at last...That's one tired pooch!

Tomorrow, the Boy is meeting up with GML's boys Eli Blue and Frankie for a dog walk fundraiser for a local no kill animal shelter. No doubt he will look like this when we get home!

• I am such an idiot. I dragged myself out of bed because I had an 8:30 AM appointment with the eye doctor. When I got to the office, the receptionist informed my appointment was for July 10th not May 10th. Somehow, I marked the wrong date on my calendar.
• I am sad that Lakeisha was voted off AI last night. I was sure that Blake would go. I still think Melinda and Jordan will be the final two. I am rooting for Jordan. I love her voice and she is just so cute. Plus, I have to represent and recognize my fellow biracial girl!
• Husband and I did a little appliance shopping last night. We bought a new blender. It's very old school with just the blend and pulse switches. I have a food processor for the other functions. Of course we had to stop at the liquor store to pick up margarita fixings!!! We also bought a rice cooker.
• One of the nice things about my Summer of Seeking Solace is that Husband and I go out for a nice lunch once a week. When I was teaching, my job was in the City, whereas Husband's job is in the suburb where we live, so we could never meet up for a lunch. Even when I was practicing law, my office was one suburb over from his job. So if we wanted to do lunch, it was usually Subway sandwiches at my office. Yesterday, we had a lovely Thai lunch with plenty of leftovers for today! Yummy!!!
• The Boy had a very scary experience yesterday. Those of you who have dogs know that anything that hits the floor is the property of the dog. Three is no such thing as a "three second rule." The Boy snatched up something that was on the floor. Suddenly, he started licking his jowls and violently wiping his face. I thought he was choking on something. He finally coughed up the undesired item into Husband's palm. The Boy had chomped on an ant! It must have been crawling around in his mouth, thus explaining the violent reaction. Now that I think about it, if the Boy could talk, he may have been saying "Get it out!"
• I am going to tape my favorite Thursday shows. It's a hockey night.

I heard this on my local radio station. I had to do a web search to be sure I was hearing what I thought I heard. Sure enough...

'Squatters' nab names of victims for Web

There is a special place in Hell for people like this.

This is simply hilarious!

I love how they smash the guitars and the drum kit in true Who fashion!

I decided that I am suspending my job search for a while. I just can't take the rejection anymore. I have always considered myself a strong, resilient person, but there is only so much one can take. I think I need to focus on something else for a while. The whole process is driving me to a place I don't want to be.

Job hunting is such a roller costar ride of emotions. You have the high of sending the resume and waiting for the interview that sends you into the stratosphere of anxiety. Then you spiral downward into the low of rejection that comes with the dreaded "FU" letter. It's amazing that I have not vomited yet. But, I can't help but yell "Let me off!"

Yesterday, I just felt like I was in that downward spiral. I spent most of the day sulking and feeling like crap. I didn't perk up until that evening when I took the Boy to playgroup. Somehow, watching dogs play and frolic can put a smile on your face. Maybe, it's because a dog's life is much more simplistic than ours. There is not much worry in their lives, except for making sure they get their next meal, especially in the Boy's case!

I don't know where this is going to lead me. But, it has to be a better place than this. I just know that I don't want to be on this ride right now.

I got an email from Alma Mater Law School about the LL.M program. They rejected my application. They gave the the line of "While your scholastic, employment and extra curricular achievements were impressive, this years pool was extremely competitive. With only a few slots available, the decision making process was extremely difficult."

If you heard a loud "Dammit" somewhere in the Northeast, it was probably me.

I am not sure how I feel about this. Part of me is pissed and disappointed. I thought for sure that I would get into the program. But there is a part of me that is a little relieved. Part of me wasn't evensure if I would have accepted if I made it. It goes back to my fear that what if I complete this program and nothing results from it? I will have a fourth sheepskin on my wall, out $13K and still no job prospects.

Then there is a part of me who just can't take anymore rejection. This is getting to be a bit much for me. People say, "Don't take it personally." or "It's not you." But, come on, after so many people telling you that you are just not good enough, you start to wonder if it is true. OK, I don't mean to beat myself up, but I can't help feeling that maybe it's just me.

Oh, and one last thing...since when do colleges and universities send rejections for graduate programs via email??? Talk about impersonal!

The Boy passed his Canine Good Citizen test this morning. The test is open to purebred and mix breed dogs. It tests basic obedience like sit, down and stay. It also tests a dogs reaction to people, other dogs and common distractions. It is also necessary for the Boy and I participate in the Angels on a Leash program, where dogs visit people in hospitals and nursing homes.

Way to go, Boy!!!

I couldn't believe it until I saw proof. GML taught her boys how to walk on the treadmill! She said that she coxed them on the treadmill and then set it to a low speed, like 1.2 MPH. Then, she would give them a treat for every few seconds that they would stay on the treadmill and walk. She would gradually extend the time that the boys would get a treat.

The boys LOVE their treadmill workouts. This will come in handy during the long cold winters in Lake Effect Snow Central when the dogs can't understand why Mom can't take them for a walk when it's 10 degrees outside!

Here's little Frankie. Not bad for a five month old puppy!

Not to be outdone by his little brother, here's Eli Blue. Eli is almost four years old. Who says you can't teach an older dog new tricks!

Now, I wonder if someone will hold a piece of chocolate and give me a treat while I am on the treadmill!!!

As seen at Lina's, Shrinky's and StyleyGeek"s

You Belong in the USA

Sweet! People either love you or hate you And you really don't care what anyone thinks Big and bold, you do things your way

• It was a goal!
• I did not like Blake's version of "You Give Love a Bad Name". Call me a traditionalist, but I remember when that song was released. It's a classic that should not be messed with.
• I was not thrilled with House last night. Suddenly it is discovered that it was the pitcher's mound that caused the infection?
• Did I mention that it WAS a goal?
• I am so sore today. I worked out for the first time in about two weeks. You can read my post at the Active Academic.
• I got an email from one of my former collegaues. It seems that my former employer has decided that the faculty celebration which takes place after graduation will no longer take place. The reasoning? The MFIC's think that the funds could be better spent on other projects. So, where are the funds going??? The MFIC are going to hire someone to tape the graduation and have the DVD available for students. What a bunch of cheap SOBs! The only perk that faculty gets at my former college is being taken away in lieu of a DVD for students!
• I love my new memory form pillows. I have not slept this well in ages! It totally cradles my head.
• I can't stress this enough...IT WAS A GOAL!!!!!!

It is looking more likely that I will not have a teaching gig for the summer. Most of the position that I have applied are for the Fall semester. None of the local colleges are hiring either. So, I am planning the first Summer of Seeking Solace, after the Summer of George episode of Seinfeld. Every summer since I was 17, I was working or going to school or working AND going to school. This summer, I will have none of those things.

This is a huge thing, my friends. How many people get this opportunity? So why do I feel a twinge of guilt?

I am reading Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. For those of you unfamiliar, it's the story of a 30-something woman who after a nasty divorce and emotional breakdown, decided to spend a year in three different parts of the world. In one chapter, she talks about the pursuit of pleasure despite feeling guilty. (Chapter 21). She talks about how we, Americans, feel we have to convince ourselves that we deserve to do something pleasurable. We work ourselves stupid only to feel guilt over self indulgence, whereas the Italian culture says "It's all right, have a great time." She realizes that it is perfectly OK to seek pleasure and tells off the voice guilt.

That really stuck me because I completely understood how the author felt. As I continue on my job hiatus. I often feel this ping of guilt if I don't accomplish something productive during the day. The idea of just spending the day reading a book rather than completing some household task starts the pangs of remorse. I was raised that you did your work first before engaging in anything fun. I am sure many of you remember having to do your chores or homework before you could play or watch TV. Why? Would it make any difference if I played first, then did my homework? What's the big deal if I spend the afternoon reading a great book and vacuum my living room at 9 PM?

It doesn't make a bit of difference.

Why am I like this? Why is it so hard for me to put myself first? We woman are really good at putting ourselves at the bottom of the list. Why are we last on the priority scale? Why the guilt if we engage in something strictly for us?

I caught myself thinking that I have to walk the Boy first, before I could do my workout. Why? Why did I decide that my workout was less important than his? As much as I love my Boy, isn't it more important to take care of his mom? Is he going to die because I waited until later to take him for his walk? Then I thought, well I have to clean the living room and kitchen before I do anything else. Why? I am not married to some ogre who wants his house spotless and a hot meal waiting for him. Husband could care less if I vacuum and dust today or tomorrow. And he doesn't care if I tell him that I just want to order pizza.

Sounds silly, no? But ask yourselves, if you have caught yourself in such a dilemma.

So, I am going to enjoy myself this summer. I am going to play and have fun. I am going to soak up the sun, dig in my garden and play with the Boy. I am going read books, go for long walks and cook wonderful meals because I WANT to. Of course, I will continue to look for a job and keep my house tidy, but it does not have be done first, or at all that day.

And I am going to tell that voice to lighten up!