The Waiting Room

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Saturday, December 31, 2005

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Posted by Seeking Solace |

Now that I am feeling somewhat human, let me tell you about my trip to Redneckville.

My mother was diagnosed with lymphoma. It came as a total surprise. My mom is 65 years old and in pretty good heath until now. A couple of weeks ago, she found this lump under her arm. She had surgery to remove the lump for biopsy before Christmas. She got the results on Tuesday. The hope is that the doctors caught it early. She will see the oncologist after the New Year. She is hopeful about the diagnosis.

My mother does not want to tell my brother about her cancer. Sadly, neither of us has spoken to my brother in over a year. This also means that we have not seen his three daughters in that time. My brother had an affair two years ago which produced a child, my nephew. While he acknowledges paternity and pays child support, he refuses to have anything to do with his son. Since my mother and I have a relationship with his son, we have been excluded from his family. What makes this story even sadder is that my mother and brother live in the same town. I have many thoughts about this, which I may post later.

While in Redneckville, we stayed with Husband’s family, which is always an interesting venture. My in laws have a small house with one bathroom. That is not usually a problem, but my husband’s brother, wife, and two children, ages 3 ½ and 5 ½, also stayed with the parents. Not much in the way of privacy or quiet. My 3 ½ year old niece had four meltdowns on Monday before noon.

My in laws suffer from Grandparent Syndrome. They spoil my niece and nephew rotten. They have more toys than Toys R Us. My in laws just gush over everything that my niece and nephew do. “Look, niece took a crap in the toilet….how cute!” Also, they let them get away with murder. Husband just laughs when he hears his mom say “Now, don’t do that” or “Please don’t touch that”. Husband says that if it was him and his brothers, the dialogue would be more authoritative, coupled with a few cuss words!

I also spent some time with my best friend, Piglet (her nickname, of course!). We went on a sinful shopping spree, had a wonderful dinner and never stopped talking to take a breath. We have been best friends for almost 25 years. Piglet is like the sister I never had. It’s hard to find someone who knows you better than you know yourself.

So, we returned home, stuffed from the eating and festivities, yet happy to be home in our own house and with the Boy. Family has always been a love-hate relationship for me. I love visiting with them, I hate spending too much time with them. I hate dealing with the garbage that makes me feel like I am eight years old, but I love the tradition and rituals that we share.

I guess that is what family is all about.

Happy New Year to Everyone!!!!!!!

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