For me to be grouchy.
Why?
- It's the end of the term and students are whinny.
- I have lots of grading to do.
- Just out of the blue, the HMFIC of my campus resigned this week.
- It is rumored that the new HMFIC hates my program because of his interactions with the B back when he was the dean.
- We are traveling to our hometown for the holidays and I detest having to deal with family for the holidays.
- Since we did not visit last year, Husband really wants to go this year.
- Because of the methotrexate, I can only handle one drink which means I can't get comfortably numb during the visit.
Students will be whinny. I limit how long I allow them to whine. And, grading will get done...it always does.
As far as the new HMFIC goes, I am taking a guarded approach. He doesn't know me from a can of paint, nor I know him. He has no idea about the hours of sweat I have put in make the department what it is now. I have good data to back me up, not to mention folks in higher positions from him who know the good work that I have done and continue to do. So, I guess I will just have to figure out what makes this guy tick.
Yet, I am still grumpy.
I can't change the family thing. I dread going through the mental preparation for it. I have to psych myself up, put on the social mask and pretend like I am so happy to see people, when all I want to do is rip their still beating heart out of their chest.
OK...maybe that was a little harsh. But, you get the idea.
I've never have unrealistically high expectations about the holidays. Actually, it's the opposite. I actually have much lower expectations. Usually, they are right on the mark. Seldom, have I ever felt like "Wow, that was not as bad as I thought." So, one would think that knowing this, I should not be stressed.
Right?
Yeah, not so much. I guess I just dread being right.
Sigh. Wake me up, when the holidays end.
2 comments:
Not sure why you must go home for the holidays but since you "must" may I suggest a few of my survival techniques for humans that stress me out :-) Book thyself into a hotel while in town rather then stay with someone you don't like. If you are staying with ones you love and enjoy, nix that suggestion. Do the nay sayers in small doses and I mean very small doses if at all possible. If these nay sayers are to be there the entire day of Christmas and during dinner, you can at least leave and go to your hotel to get peace afterwards (thus why I stay at a hotel if need be). Good luck and short walks also help. I have used that excuse that I need to get some fresh air as I am sooo fatigued (which in my case is the truth). Getting out for even a few minutes can break the tension and help you to regain your strength. Hoping you stay strong and perhaps rethink this strategy next year. Perhaps Thanksgiving might be the holiday to visit. Everyone is usually stuffing their faces and will have less time to say something stupid :-)
abcofra: We do stay at a hotel. That helps a little. Unfortunately, with work commitments and distance, traveling at Thanksgiving is not a great option.
Small doses of family insanity seems to be the best remedy.
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