The Waiting Room

This could take a while...

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Come On, People!

Posted by Seeking Solace |

I am sure that by now, you are aware of the hot mess among the academic blogs regarding parents and non parents in academia. It has not been ignored by your truly, but given all the interview stuff going on, I haven't had a chance to express my views on the subject until now.

And here it is. A classic Seeking Solace rant.

Are you fucking kidding me? What is wrong with you people? We are supposed to be near the top of the education and intelligence food chain. Yet, a few of my academic peers out there have resorted to nasty and vicious name calling for anyone who does not agree with her view of "feminism" and "choice". Since when do so-called educated people act no better than the schoolyard bully?

Come on people? We all took Critical Thinking (at least I hope so, if not, you should sit in MY Critical Thinking class). We should be able to have a healthy discussion or vigorous debate without resorting to the behavior that is classess. What's next? We are going to start running "Your Mama" jabs at each other?

Honestly, the evil that has been spewed, especially against one person who I am very fond of. is completely unnecessary, inappropriate and just plain tacky. And if guilty party is reading...yes, I am calling you out, not by name, but you know who you are. You owe an apology not just to the person you insulted with your comments, but to rest of us for stooping to the lowest level of decency and lack of home training.

With regard to the issue that started this whole mess, it seems to me that everyone is trying to apply theory to situations that are best solved on a case by case, individual by individual basis. we all bring different baggage to the workplace. You see, my friends, theory like what was being discussed does not work in the real world. Exceptions and contingencies causes such theories to fail, thus leading to the chaos that resulted in bog world.

Here's my take on the issue, having worked in the academic world and the private sector. All of us have work-life balance issues. That is why the arguments that I have read over the past couple of days cannot seen as black and white components of some theory. Common sense and boundaries of what is acceptable and what is not have to be implemented. And if not, they should be. Sometimes, it takes one person to stand up and do what is what we all know is right.

It's all about common sense notion of treating each other with dignity and respect. If someone is abusing or upsetting the work-life balance, that person needs to be held accountable, regardless of whether they have kids, don't have kids or whatever the issue is. There are always going to be people who feel the need to abuse the system. Being an asshole is an equal opportunity employer. But, lump everyone who has a similar circumstance as the offender is ludacris. Everyone wants the same result. It's only in give and take that balance is achieved. I think everyone needs to recognize that they are on the same team. Recognize that everyone has issues. I would hope that the person with children who needs time off to would be just as accommodating to me when I need time off because of my RA. If not, then we need to have a serious discussion...without the name calling.

I think many of us need check ourselves and our egos at the door.


rented life said...

Us white country kids said "your mom" instead of "Your mama".

"You lack the decency God gave a billy goat"-Judge Milian. That's the quote I felt like I could see you saying. Often. :)

Seeking Solace said...

Rented Life: My dad used to say "You don't have the sense God gave a bastard duck."


k8 said...

Yep! I think that you and I pretty much feel the same way about all of this.

My grandmother (and later my mother) use to tell us "that's not how we treat other people." Now, "that's not how we treat other people" covered everything from pinching one's younger brother to genocide, but I can definitely hear her applying it to some of the participants in the discussions during the past couple of weeks. This is why I don't reply to name-calling with more of the same. It's also why I have no problem calling people on doing this. I have higher standards for myself and the people I care about. Sadly, I'm sometimes disappointed.