You have heard me blog about dealing with the pain and associated problems with my RA. But what is the hardest part of the illness, even more so than the pain, is to have people understand that I am sick. My symptoms look benign, even unnoticeable. After all, who isn't tired after a long day? Who doesn't feel achy? Well. for me, that's my life 24/7. Most of the time, it's just a matter of degree. But when the pain and fatigue are at their worst, it can be incapacitating.
I've been told that I should just take a pill. Some have even told me to suck it up. Others try to tell me that it is my fault that I am sick. My mom tried to tell me once that I have RA because I don't eat meat. (So wrong!) Even well intentioned comments can be frustrating. Yea I have heard of magnet therapy. No, it does not work. Yes, I take vitamins. Yes, I have taken this drug or that drug...yadda, yadda yadda.
What I want for people to understand is that I am sick. I will have this condition for the rest of my life. While I refuse to sit on the sidelines, you have to understand that there are days where I will not have my A-game. But, I am doing the best that I can.
I may have an invisible illness, but I am not invisible.
3 comments:
Great post. I think the same could be true of depression (especially just take a pill) and many other invisible illnesses. I don't understand when people suggest that these things are self inflicted, or that sufferers are just 'being stubborn and not taking a pill'. I sympathize when you post about pain - I don't have RA but have suffered for 8 years from a variety of symptoms from repetitive strain. Some days I cannot use a computer or hold a pen, but it is difficult to explain to people why a pain killer is not the simple solution. (freaky: I'm using the new browser Chrome to type this comment and it highlights my spelling errors...)
Fabulous. We all need an "invisible (and for that matter, visible) illness" reminder.
It is already hard enough when you have a temporary but invisible illness (such as, in my case, a slipped disk. Yes, pain killers helped, but provided it was vicodin, which put me way out there).
The hardest for me though is not as much an invisible illness that one I can't easily talk about: vaginism. It can be cured (and I am putting much of my savings and free time towards that) and it is not constant pain, but when it makes me feel miserable, or that I am in pain after some treatment, or that the medication I am taking makes me loopy, I cannot rant to anybody else than my boyfriend (or my blog) because, let's face it, I am not about to talk about this kind of things with my colleagues. I guess I'll have to blog about it now!
People who think you just need to "take a pill" or "suck it up" don't know their chance not to be suffering from something similar and should be slapped in the face until they understand it. Or maybe they deserve to feel weird, unexplainable, excruciating pains via the means of a voodoo doll or something. Gah!
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